Tuesday, May 27, 2014

In the eyes of a wolf.

I looked at a caged wolf mesmerized and sad all at once. He looked happy when the care giver petted him, he looked content eating what they fed. Somehow, I could not shake away the sinking feeling I felt looking at him. I looked around to see if anyone else felt the same way too, but, the crowd was happily chatting away, some eating their snacks, some explaining their kids about the wolf, oblivious to my turmoil. I could not understand why I felt the way I was feeling, until I looked at his eyes.

In his eyes, I saw a cry for help. I could see he wanted to get out and be free. It was not his life that he was leading. He was supposed to be in a jungle, being the predator he was created to be. I wondered, what was it that was keeping him inside? Was it the security of the life he has gotten used to or the fear of unknown outside that cage? Will he survive if he got out or has he been conditioned so much that he has forgotten who he once was?  I moved on to watch the next animal only to find a reflection of the wolf and he was with me long after I left the zoo.

Thursday, November 21, 2013


Yes, I have been away from writing blogs. But, I have not been away from reading them. I read my blog roll religiously everyday. Make note of things I should write and then be lazy about it.

Today, a friend tagged me to write, things about me which people might not know, on FB and I kept on writing. I realized , how much I missed writing here. Here's what I wrote

I am tagged to write things about me, which people might not know.So, here is my attempt at it-

1. Many have told me that I give a first impression of being quiet, serious and headstrong. I talk endlessly and laugh at the stupidest things with my friends. I love to crack PJs (not Pajama , Poor jokes-Silly;). But, I do take time to open up to people.

2. I dreamed of being a homemaker from as long as long as I could remember. Thanks to all the Hindi movies I watched, I wanted to cook, welcome my husband when he comes home, take care of kid-blah blah, you get the picture- Tried it for few months and totally failed at it, I would curl up in bed with a book/laptop- So much for dreams coming true!

3. I take my job seriously. I am the happiest when loaded with work which I love doing. I am not denying –Money is a bonus, but even if I had all the money in the world, I would still work with same passion.

4. I was never an “oh-so-cute-baby “person. I never picked up babies in bus/train or looked at a baby and said- “ohh.. I want one”. I love Stuthi with all my heart, but I still am far from being kid -friendly person.

5. I am a very romantic person. I love candle light dinner, walk in the park holding hands, talk sweet nothings- Sudhir, are you reading this?;) But, these days, quiet after Stuthi is asleep sounds more romantic than anything else.

6. I will always feel bad about–not being good at dancing or singing. Don’t get me wrong-I have joined every class I could think of-Salsa, Jazz, traditional- I am bad at all of it equally. Only person who loves to hear me sing is Sudhir (Blush), but then, I am not sure if he actually listens!

Friday, July 15, 2011

Loveit?Hate it?

Because of my new job role, I do not have to be in office if I chose not to. So, I kind of have this love-hate relationship with working from home.

- I miss walking to a colleague's desk for a pending work and look at her like a cute puppy to get the answer.

- I hate listening to a voice mail of a colleague when I want to reach him/her immediately.

- I miss the lunch breaks where we girls would vow to go on diet and then share cheese quesadilla.

- I miss the early morning wishes before we start work, which used to end only when someone had to rush for a meeting.

- I hate waking up and logging in to meetings. Believe me, it is not as nice as it sounds:(

- I hate working from bed (trying to change it!), I feel like a lazy woman without any purpose in life!

- I love working from home when I have lot of work, I can shut down everything around( which is nothing) and just concentrate.

- I love welcoming Sudhir home in the evening .

- I love the long walks and badminton games in the evening which would not have happened if I had to drive home from work.

- I hate being so close to the kitchen that each time I feel like taking a break, I just go and open the kitchen shelf.

- I love listening to music loud when I am working. Listening on ear phone at office is so not same.

- I hate hearing my mom say "You are home all day, why don't you cook something nice!"- Hello!!, I am home, but I do work!

- I love talking to my mom/mil in the mornings (their night time) , so we do not have to rush to their cooking and not get enough time for my call.

- I hate knowing, Sudhir is the only person I see the entire day , until my walk .

It amazes me how much additional time we get if we do not have to drive to office. Time to get organized and use all that courses I took on Time management?

Monday, July 11, 2011

30 Day Walk challenge

I am not much of an exerciser. These days, working from home gets me all cranky . Going for shopping/Movie does not seem to help.

Yesterday, I went for a long walk listening to my favorite song these days and felt so good after that. I would love to continue this habit , what better way to start it than take on a challenge . Looks like I kind of like these challenges and can be very disciplined til I complete it.

So, here I start my 30 day walk challenge, each day I will walk for an hour , explore new places click pictures if I find something interesting.

My 10 day juice challenge will start on August 1. I am so looking forward to it...:)

Sunday, June 19, 2011

Weight Check -I did it

Yipppeee, I completed the 7 day Raw food challenge. Saying, I am happy and proud of myself will be an understatement. I survived 7 whole days without any cooked food, just raw vegetables and fruits(lots of it!)

I know I did not write anything on Day 4,5 and 6. They were much easier than the first three days. My body got used to the new diet. I developed some sort of rashes on Day 5 but it disappeared on its own.

After 7 days on this diet, my skin has started clearing out ( I had lot of pimples and marks), now it looks so much better. I am sooo happy to look at myself in the mirror !

I have lost couple of pounds(7 to be exact), now I am 65 kgs , that gives me bit of breathing space, I am not so close to the dreaded 70 mark you see.

I have lot of energy, I do not feel sleepy after my meals. I feel like doing different things. It shows how much our food habits affect our activities.

Even emotionally, I feel much calmer, I sleep better(not that I slept any less before;), I am more cheerful than before.

If you think , how can a person change in just 7 days, believe me it can happen! I am so excited about it that I do not have the right words to describe it!

But then, 7 days was not all that rosy, it took all my will power not to munch on my favorite snacks or take a small bite from Sudhir's plate.

My worst craving was(or still is) chicken wings with spicy sauce , the one from Buffallo wild wings . Second would be Noodles and then chocolate.

But then, who says things come easy ? There is no gain without some pain. In this case, pain is just to control the thoughts(. Exploring new fruits, veggies can be exciting if you set your mind to it. We can eat all we want without having to worry about calories, imagine having any amount of mango you want when you are on diet:-)

From today, I can go back to cooked food diet with bit of moderation. But, do I want to go for it? I think I don't. I would love to continue it until I give in and lets see when will that be:-)

Thank you all of you for the support .It was so encouraging to see your comments here. And to Sudhir for carrying loads of veggies everyday, hiding delicious chips/chocolate/cooking food when I was down with cravings/tolerating my raw food talks for the entire day ,list just goes on...

I even made him go green.. guess how???

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Weight Check-Day 3

My body - Why are you feeding me all the weird stuff, I want to eat yummy dishes you have prepared for Sudhir.

Me- ha, ha, you won't get it. Shed the fat or else you will suffer more.

My body - No, I beg you .

Me- here comes your salad for tonight.

My body- You think, I will obey you .. muahhhhhhhh.. eat all the stupid food you want, I will still be same.
Me : Please nooo, I beg you
My body: muahhhhhaahh

So, this is my state. I am supposed to be detoxing by now and supposed to start losing weight. But my body refuses to budge. It is happy with the food it is getting and does not mind it! It refuses to lose weight or at least show some signs that I am on healthy diet. Unlike others in the challenge who are feeling energy boost, clear skin etc

I am so sad, but I wont give up.

After 3 days, I have not even lost a kilo (not even a pound!). So that is my story on Day 3. Today is the Day 4, so far so good . I haven't cheated yet!

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Weight Check- Day 2

I completed the day 2 without much problems. I had Fruits for breakfast, weird looking but not so bad tasting green smoothie for lunch , Soup and big salad for dinner. The program is designed such that we can have any amount of raw food and limited quantity of nuts and seeds, unlimited soup/green smoothie.

The package comes with the online forum where you can interact with the other participants on the challenge , post blogs or add friends. I was amazed to see the entire group consisted of only ladies! I guess, men never feel the need to reduce weight(That is what Sudhir says:)

So, every small problems we face are discussed here, like someone felt she would die if she does not eat a chocolate immediately (you get the idea;). It is stupid , but it is fun to see so many people doing the same thing as you do and helps you stay on Track.

We go for shopping fresh vegetables every day and have started liking the experience. We stare at all weird looking veggies and laugh. Some look like small Christmas trees ( I mean, Kale). I found a new nut which tastes amazing and is healthy (Pine nuts)

Most difficult part is to pass the Chocolate row in super market and not buy it. But, I think about myself minus all the additional weight and the temptation goes away!

Cooking for Sudhir has taken a hit :( From last two days he is cooking his food as I can not cook the food and not feel like having it. I think I am feeling much better today interms of cravinga and I can cook something special.

So I am on Day 3 today, will blog about it tomorrow. So far so good:)